Most of you know that I like to run...or should I say that I like what it feels like to stop running. Makes sense. Don't tell me it doesn't. Well, when I started doing races I remember thinking a marathon would be something I would like to cross off my list but 26.2 miles? For reals? That is twice as far as a half marathon (did ya know that?) and a half marathon is the farthest I've ever ran.
Well at last years Ogden half marathon I finished and was like tra la la, that was fun and kinda easy. So naturally I need to step it up and either sign up for a full or crush my previous time of 1:42, both could be done, but which should I choose? I know. I should just stress about a decision ( I REALLY stink at making even the most minuscule of decisions, right Ove?) for the next several months. Will I have time to train? What about burn out? Oh and did I mention that if I run a marathon, why not just go for it and try and qualify for Boston? I know I could do it if I set my mind to it. Ross tries to talk me out of the craziness, but I tell him it is now or never - my body is going to fall apart young - this much I swear to be true.
October rolls around and I do it! I signed up for the Ogden marathon. I kind of peed my pants a little when I do. I committed! I am doing this! The stress is over. Until I start looking at every bit of running, training and schedule info I can get my hands on. I looked at stuff daily for 3 months. No joke. I might have some obsessive tendencies. I find the one and pick the beginning of January to jump into this specific training plan (I had been running very consistently even before I started this plan and it wasn't much different than what I was doing, so I should be good). Each day I cross off a day. I get super excited. I like looking at my plan and seeing hat I haven't missed a day of training/cross training for over a month. I even joined a running group for my long runs on Saturdays to get my butt off the treadmill. I am running in the snow on Saturdays, but love it. I am getting faster and everything is going well.
Until one day I am doing sprints and hill repeats and my knee feels kinda funny. No big deal. Then later that day it kills. I can't stand, sit or especially walk down the stairs without pain. Ice. Massage. Stretching. Went for my long run on Saturday and only made it 3 miles. Blerg. Ice. Massage. Stretching and no running for a few days. Biking hurts, so I swim. Oh man. I stink at swimming. Anyone know how depressing it is to be struggling to keep up with the 300lb man in the lane next to you? I do - I see his pot belly every time I have to stick my head in the water and I groan with disgust with how slow I am. Wednesday I went for an easy run and everything went well.. so I did my planned 13 miles on Saturday and..I felt great. Hallelujah...until a couple of hours later. The pain sets in and I want to cry because I am scared of not being to run.
It's been a month since the day it started hurting and I've been running off and on. I have been through 2 physical therapists and was diagnosed with both IT band and runners knee issues - pretty common in runners, but it doesn't change the fact that I can't run pain free. I am doing all that I can to keep running - including draining our cafeteria plan in a matter of a few short weeks with PT visits. Now I am at a sports specific physical therapist office and they at least seem to know what they are talking about. But who knows if I will be able to run this marathon now, let alone qualify for Boston. Oh yeah, and now they have changed their qualifying times for the first time since 1980. Naturally.
I wish I was like Pollyanna and could just roll with the punches, but that doesn't jive with the obsessiveness I mentioned earlier. It is frustrating to finally commit to something, have the will power to be doing something, doing it well and have it all change in one day. To be doing all that you can to get back to where you were and have it not be enough. Bleh. I know I am not the only one that this happens to, and that this post was unbelievably boring, but you know? It feels good to have a pity party sometimes, even if no one is listening.
15 years ago
